


When It Rains

by Lidsworth



Series: Blood work/Foundation  (TGA) [2]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Hide suffering, Kaneki being protective, M/M, PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-04-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 02:40:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3751288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lidsworth/pseuds/Lidsworth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaneki must fix his home, before he can live in it. And renovation can be a long, tiring process. </p><p>Or </p><p>Hide suffers mental scars from his near death experience, and Kaneki does his best to help Hide cope.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When It Rains

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after TGA

 

He shouldn't have left Hide alone so soon, not after what had happened to him just a few weeks ago. But the groceries had all but disparaged that week, and Hide wasn't well enough to go the store alone yet.

Kaneki's trip to the supermarket was to be short. Get in, get out. Buy what Hide little could eat, get some coffee beans, and some more medication (for Hide), get out, fill the car with gas, and get back to their apartment, all before Hide woke.

 

If Hide woke, then he'd do so in pain, though not the excruciating type that Kaneki had been used to in the last few months. Hopefully he'd learn to wake up without straining his wound, or his torn muscles

 

As usual, so many concerns regarding Hide had swarmed Kaneki's mind. He supposed it was karma, though. He'd spent months concerned about everyone and everything _but_ Hide, while Hide spent months only thinking about Kaneki. 

 

Since the accident at Anteiku, Hide's physical health had been declining, as his wound had been discovered to be infected after they were able to supply him with proper medical care. He'd been superscribed various medications for the wound and the effects it came with, and prescribed antibiotics for the infection he'd gotten when he arrived at the hospital (Noro's kagune had been thriving with bacteria).

 

When he woke, he was in pain, but not like it had been at first. It was pain that was to be expected (though even if it was “to be expected” Kaneki hated seeing Hide in any sort of pain).

  
While deep in thought, Kaneki had made it to the store. _Get in and get out,_ he repeated to himself, as he walked into the brightly lit building. 

 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Hide felt so out of touch with himself (in fact, he no longer felt like himself). The new level of dependency he had on Kaneki disgusted him, as he seemed to lose his independence all together. Simple task had become impossible, due to the pain that moving around their small home had caused him.

 

Of course, it was worse in the beginning. At least now, he could get out of bed by himself, and do small task. But with his head swarming with the effects of medication, and his body weak from fatigue and blood loss, if there wasn't a toilet to throw up in near by, or a bed to fall in, Hide could go nowhere really.

 

So when he woke that morning, he was mildly surprised to find himself alone (but what did he expect. They had run out of what little groceries they had left days ago, and seeing as he couldn't leave the house, it only made sense that Kaneki would go grocery shopping for him), and once again, unable to do anything to stave his sure to come boredom.

 

Cooking of course wasn't an option, they had no food (and it wasn't like Hide could stand long enough to cook for himself). And he wasn't really hungry anyway. Maybe he could try to walk through the house a little bit more.

 

Swinging his shaky legs over the bed, and steadying them the best he could on the wooden floor, Hide began his slow waddle out of the room. He had to pause every so often, as the feeling of dizziness still bothered him just a little.

 

He supposed he could go as far as the living room, sit on the couch, and watch some television for the day. But a quick shower would be nice. He hadn't taken one in days because he didn't want to make Kaneki help him anymore. Kaneki did everything for him, but now with his boyfriend gone, he could help himself.

 

He grabbed what he needed from his drawers, and with a slow stride, he made his way to the restroom.

 

Undoing his clothing hadn't been as easy as he had hoped, and a twinge of pain still surged throughout his body as he removed his shirt. He refused to look in the mirror after the garment was removed, he didn't need to see the angry gash that had been pulled together with staples and stitches. He _saw_ it in his dreams every night anyway.

 

No—he _relived_ it.

 

So no, he wouldn't look in the mirror.

 

After removing his pants and his underwear, Hide stepped into the shower.

 

He jumped as the cool water hit his body, though eased up, just slightly, as the water morphed into a soothing shade of warm. He inhaled the steam, and closed his eyes as it worked magic to undo the knots in his system.

Some of them, on the physical level, melted away like ice. Though with each breath, his mind began repaying memories of the catastrophe at Anteiku.

 

He tried to block them out, but it was impossible.

 

The wound from the ghoul, who he later discovered was called Noro, Mr. Seidou's decapitation, his own walk with death, the smell of smoke, the cold snow on his body as Kaneki placed him down on the cold fluff...he relieved it all in the restroom, and suddenly, the steam that had worked such wonders on the tension in his body had suddenly suffocated him with anxiety.

 

He bit his lip as the memories became too painful, as the “what ifs” started filling his head. What if he died? What if he hadn't been granted pardon? What if Kaneki died? What if Noro ate him, or took him back to Aogiri and tormented him, what if he'd never been able to save Kaneki?

 

Before he knew it, his chest began to ache as he contained a tortured wail within himself. His eyes burned to the brim with tears, as the smoke from Anteiku seemed go graze the soft tissue.

 

Suddenly, he could no longer even breath. He felt his nostrils fill with smoke, he felt warm blood run down his sides, and a sharp pain, starting from his wound, surged throughout his entire body.

 

He couldn't hold it in anymore. His death was replaying itself again, his walk to his own personal Calvary was destroying his mind.

 

He screamed.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

Kaneki knew something was off, very off. He could hear the shower water spewing out of its faucet when he walked into his home, though the silenced that accompanied it was what set him off, followed by a blood curdling scream.

What little groceries he purchased lay on the ground as he dropped them in his rush to the restroom. The screaming grew in severity as he tore the door open, and was met with a thick wall of stream. A single red eye shone through the fog, as he searched the restroom for the Hide (of course he knew where he was, but the sound of Hide screaming had been so foreign to him, that he had to clarify just who exactly was screaming).

 

Hide had been in the shower, collapsed, and dragging his hands through his hair, pulling at the thick strands, chest going in and out as he sobbed The ghoul had expected this. He'd expected Hide to wake in pain.

 

Kaneki removed his shoes and his jacket as he stepped into the water with his boyfriend, feeling the thick droplets of hot water hit his head.

 

Slowly, he knelt down beside Hide, and wrapped his arms around Hide's smooth skin. He surprised that it had taken this long for Hide to break. He went through the worse of it, in Kaneki's opinion. He'd put up a happy face for as long as he could.

 

But Hide, unlike Kaneki's other friends, Hide was human. This had all been too much for him. And Kaneki could accept that.

 

“What's wrong, Hide?” Kaneki asked calmly, pulling his wet boyfriend into his lap.

 

Hide trembled as Kaneki pulled him closer and into his lap, though the screaming receded slightly as he relaxed in Kaneki's arms.

 

“Th-there's b-blood all over m-me,” Hide whispered, “it's on my arms, and on my stomach and...and my hair...”  
  
Kaneki realized that Hide must have been associating the water with blood, so without removing his arms, his kagune sprouted from under his shirt, and turned off the shower.

 

“There is no blood Hide, you're just scared,” Kaneki replied softly, “Just calm down. I'm here. You're here. Calm down.”

 

Hide continued to breath erratically, and continued to whimper for a long while. Kaneki stroked his hair to calm him, and even rubbed his cheek just to get his nerves used to touch again.

 

When he began to fear for Hide's health (they'd been sitting there for a long while, and Hide had begun to shiver), he scooped the blond in his arms, and brought him to the bed room, where he dried him with one of their softest towels, and dressed him in lose, comfortable clothing.

 

Caring for Hide never bothered Kaneki, because Hide had done everything in his power to take care of him. Kaneki owed his soul to Hide, even if the blond didn't believe it.

 

"I'm sorry Kaneki," Hide spoke, as Kaneki placed him on the bed, "It must be hard, having to always take care of me like this." 

 

The ghoul widened his eyes slightly, unaware that Hide had returned to his senses.

"It's okay, Hide," Kaneki let his friend's head rest on the pillow, "You deserve it."

 

Though meant as a compliment, Hide's face suggested otherwise. He hated being so helpless, and in his endeavor to care for himself, he'd ended up hurting himself. It was embarrassing. To have Kaneki have to rescue him from the shower.

 

He had no trouble remembering what he'd gone through in the shower, and the shame suffocated him as old bricks did an aging house. But that's the thing, the house was old, waiting to collapse. Hide....He'd been waiting to collapse (even if he wasn't aware of it).

 

And it seemed that, given his reaction to the situation, that Kaneki was waiting with him.

 

“Kaneki...can you stay with me please just for a while,” Hide looked away from him as he spoke, he didn't want the ghoul to see his watery eyes.

 

Kaneki considered the groceries rolling on the floor, and the door that had been left unlocked. Though he could always order something to eat, and any intruder who had the nerve to come into their home would have to answer to him.

So with little thought, the ghoul climbed into the bed, and pulled his human close.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I can see Hide having some problems after the entire battle, even if he tries to push through strong. I could see, if they lived, Kaneki taking care of him, and not vice versa. 
> 
> Anyway hope you liked it, have a wonderful week and God bless!


End file.
